January 12, 2011 was the beginning of a long journey for me. It was a journey to a miracle. It was the day I woke up with a strange glow in my eye. After a visit to the eye doctor I found out I had blood clot in my eye and that it was blocking a vein to my retina and causing fluid to build up in it and causing a blind spot in my eye. If you would like to read that story click here ->I Was Blind But Now I See
From that story you can see that I was healed but since that time I have had a few more eye issues caused by side effects of the drug used to treat my eye. At first I did not understand why God would heal me then decide to take my vision back away. I have had days of scary things happening in my vision and then turn around would receive good news from the doctor. It’s been a long 2 years of riding an emotional roller coaster full of a lot of ups and downs.
In July of this year I started losing vision again and seeing black spider web looking things. Over the past 4 months I have had several doctor visits and at the last visit the very first thing that happened to start this whole thing this was beginning to happen again. The vein that was damaged from the blood clot had started clogging and leaking again which was causing a small amount of retinal swelling. My last doctor visit was about a month ago and the doctor left me feeling that eye injections were in my future again or that my vision would one day be gone in that eye. Thankfully one thing I have been very blessed to have through most of this is that Jesus has helped to give me peace to the point that I do not think about my eyes for the most part anymore.
This past month everywhere I turn a Bible verse keeps coming up for me. The verse that keeps coming up is Hebrews 4:16. Let us then approach God’s throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need.
It’s almost as if I have joined some sort of Bible verse of the month club. That scripture keeps coming up in sermons, devotionals, and other people’s blogs. In my Bible study class the other day it talked about boldly coming to God with our prayer and I came across that verse again. Normally I am a pretty bold prayer, but I think when it came to my eye I was starting to get it in my head that God had another plan so maybe I should just keep praying to keep the comfort and the peace He has been giving me throughout this whole thing and I had somewhere along the line quit praying for healing.
Today was my Retina doctor appointment. Before my appointment I checked my email and in it I found that I had received a daily devotional from a friend and guess which scripture was written in a note attached to the devotional? You guessed it Hebrews 4:16. I had already done what I thought was a bold prayer last night and this morning but now upon seeing this I was thinking wow I think God is trying to tell me something so I pray another what I thought was a pretty bold prayer. I then got into my car to head to the retina doctor. Imagine my surprise when I started my car and the Joyce Meyer cd I had left in the cd player started playing exactly to where the minute it come over the speakers she said.. “Let us approach God’s throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need”. I think if I would have been driving I would have crashed my car I was so shocked!
I was running late for the doctor but this time I think I really got what God was trying to tell me. Not only did I need to pray boldly and ask God for exactly what I wanted but I also then needed to BELIEVE it would happen. So that moment I prayed “Okay God this is what I need, I need for you to heal my eye. You can do anything because you are amazing I also know that you can do this so please heal my eye”. I know that sounds awful bold and maybe not the way we should talk to God, but then yet He is the creator of the universe so He CAN do anything so why would I not believe he can fix my tiny little eye and then boldly ask Him to fix it and believe He can and will?
Once I got to the eye doctor my vision was checked and I saw worse on the eye chart than I did last time I was there. During the doctor’s exam instead of being worried about her diagnosis I had a feeling of peace, I felt like God had told me I was healed and for some odd reason even with the vision test not coming out the best I still thought I was going to be healed.
When she got done examining me she looked a bit dumbfounded and she said “I did not expect this and I am amazed”. If you knew my doctor you would know dumbfounded is not her specialty, she is very self assured and pretty confident in what she thinks she knows. She then proceeded to tell me the eye had ‘healed itself’ and there was no more bleeding in my eye. She then said that from what she saw at my last visit she thought that by this visit I would be way worse. When I asked her why my vision was a little worse even though she said I was healed was because of the past bleeding I had in my eye there is still debris from that floating around and that over time it will eventually go away and what does not go away I will get used to and not notice so much any more.
I know that my eye did not heal by it self, only God could do that and he did. I also think that maybe He left that stuff floating around in my eye as a way of reminding me of how far I have came and what a huge gift He has given me. Not only in my eyesight but also in my ability to trust and rely on Him.
Matthew 7:7 “Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to youM
1 John 5:14-15 14 This is the confidence we have in approaching God: that if we ask anything according to his will, he hears us. 15 And if we know that he hears us—whatever we ask—we know that we have what we asked of him.
Thank you so much for reading and God bless you 🙂
If you would like to read any of my other stories I wrote while going through the eye issues you can click the links from the sidebar titled My Eye Story.