A Sister’s Cry

Sometimes things just don’t make sense. How can it be such a beautiful day and something so terrible be going on inside someone that they would try to take their own life? How can someone be hurting so bad that they no longer want to exist while at the same time others are on top of the world? How could I have missed it? Why did I not see the hurt or feel the pain? How could I have been so blind?

I asked the Jesus, “Why must there be so much pain? Why must there be death?”

He replied,

“I give healing and life, those who come to me will never die”

“I am the love that never leaves”

“I am the one who hears the cries of those who call”

“I am the one who will catch them when everything comes crashing down

“I am the strength when they can’t fight anymore”

“I am the hope when it feels like hope is lost”

     “Right now things may seem out of control but never forget that I am in control.

Yes! He is in control!

Right now

Right this moment

I lay my broken heart at his feet, reach my hands out and shout “Hallelujah!”

I will praise him because he deserves to be praised.

Right now things seem so terribly out of control but I know God is in control!

He is the hope.

He is the strength needed to fight the good fight.

When everything came crashing down he caught it all.

He heard my call.

He never leaves.

He is protector, healer, and almighty comforter.

He is love.

I have seen his power and I will continue to put all my hope in him.

I know He will hear the cries of those who are hurting.

He will reach down and wrap them his loving arms.

He will hold them, protect them and heal them.

He will give them peace.

Let us then approach God’s throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need. Hebrews 4:16

This is what I pray for today will you join me?

T

Whiting out the Brown

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Quietness fills my ears as I watch the snow floating softly down like feathers,

covering everything in a blanket of white.

Trees once brown and decaying,

now covered by a fluffy snow floating down,

whiting out the dull brown

Once bare tree branches bend beneath the weight

looking as if they are about to break.

Bowing beneath the lovely white

instead of broken a beautiful sight.

As I watch each little intricate detail make this picture before me today

I know it is time to pray

Dear Lord, thank you for the never ending beauty you always put before my eyes.  And today thank you for the snow, softly floating down, sprinkled from your hands, dusting everything in sight with your beauty. Amen

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“Son” light shining bright

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I feel a sadness in the darkness as I awaken this morning.

Tears drops slip down my face as thoughts of yesterday plague my mind.

As I turn over planning to bury my face in my pillow to go back to sleep I glimpse the moon through my window, full and shining bright.

Before my eyes the moon begins descending down the sky taking along with it the darkness.

On the other side of my room from different window, the sun, hidden below the dark horizon begins making its ascent up the sky.

Orange fingers of sunlight begin clutching the edge of the darkness as if grasping on to pull itself up, tinting the sky to a perfect shade of pink and blue.

I feel peacefulness overcome me as I perch on the edge of this place where yesterday ends and today begins.

The sun light slowly washes away the darkness on one side of the sky while the moon slips down below the horizon on the other side, taking yesterday away as this new day begins.

No matter how dark things may seem Jesus is always here, He is the light.  Jesus is the “Son” light that always shines bright.

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You, Lord, are my lamp; the Lord turns my darkness into light. 2 Samuel 22:29
This is the day the Lord has made; we (I) will rejoice and be glad in it. Psalm 118:24

Who You Want Me To Be

Lead me, Guide me, Show me, Stand beside me as I go.

Let my hands be your hands, let my feet be your feet.

Lead my feet to become beautiful feet, that are willing and able to go where ever you may send them. No matter where, give me the courage I need to stay the course and complete the journey.

Guide my hands to become beautiful hands as you teach them to be hard working hands that touch where you want them to touch, leaving your handprints scattered all over the place.

Show me how to let go of myself and stand holding only on to you. Using only your strength to be the person who you sent me to be.

Remembrance and Thanksgiving

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photo courtesy of crosscards.com

This past week I have been looking through my journal, reflecting on life and realizing what a blessing it is. As I read through I am amazed at all the changes that have taken place, especially those that have happened in the past four years.  Four years ago though I thought I was happy I really was not as happy as I fooled myself into thinking I was. I know now that I was missing some one in my life and that some one was Jesus.  What I also did not know at that time was is that in just two short months my life was going to be rocked and that I was going to be starting a new walk in life.  One that would take me through many hills, valleys and loads of mountain tops.  If someone would have came to me at that point in my life four years ago and told me all the things that have happened since then and that are still going on right now I would have never ever believed them.  As journey through my journal this week I can see just what an amazing transformation and  journey it has been.  I can’t wait to find out what else God has in store.  Today I am thankful.

Remember When?

Remember when I used to cry myself to sleep at night?

Remember when I was always running away but not knowing what I was running away from?

Remember when I used to search for happiness but never could quite seem to grasp it.

Remember when I searched and searched but never knew what it was that I was searching for?

Remember when I didn’t how to love myself or how to accept love that was given to me?

Remember when restlessness and panic were my normal way of life?

Remember when loneliness and sadness lingered within me?

Remember when I was angry and exhausted?

Remember when I just wanted to give up?

Where were you?

Where were you when I was falling apart? 

Where were you when I was scared and alone?

Where were you when I needed a friend?

Where were you when I was crying?

Where were you then?

You were right here.

You were always here.

You were here but I couldn’t see you because my eyes were closed.
You were here calling to me, but I covered my ears because I didn’t want to hear. 
You were here trying to be my friend, but my heart was to cold to let you in.
I pushed you aside and stumbled around on my own for such a long time.
I was falling farther and farther, feeling lost and alone, thinking nobody cared,
but you were still here,
Though you allowed me go my own way,
You were still here reaching out your hand, always ready to help me should I decide I wanted to stand.
You were here through it all. 
Always right here…

waiting for me.

Remember when I took that first step toward you? It was so hard for me to trust.

Remember when I thought I wasn’t good enough because I was such a broken mess?

Remember when you took my hand in yours and told me you loved me anyway?

Despite all my anger, disbelief and rejection of you, you still welcomed me with open arms. Loving me for who I was, forgiving all that I had done.

Remember when you showed me that what I had been longing and searching for was always right here waiting for me?

Remember when you picked me up and started putting the pieces back together again?

Remember when you breathed love, hope and joy back into my life?

Remember when you never gave up on me?

Dear Jesus,  Thank you for never giving up on me. Thank you for giving your life to save my life.

For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. John 3:16

Dear Readers. Today I would like to wish you a Happy Thanksgiving! Even if you live in a country where Thanksgiving is not a holiday, Thanksgiving can always be celebrated.  So today take some time to take note of your blessings and give thanks to the Lord.

Happy Thanksgiving,

T

Give thanks to the LORD, for he is good; his love endures forever. Psalm 107:1 

The Ticking of the Clock

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As I wait for you

I hear the ticking of the clock,

the sound is so loud

your voice is blocked.

It’s hard to hear you

when the ticking’s so loud.

Though I try and try

your voice can’t be found.

Dear precious Lord,

please send your voice

to drown out the noise.

Please show me you are here

and dry up my tears.

As the clock keeps ticking,

I will be waiting and listening.

Thank you for the Messy People

We are called to love others.  Not just the easy ones but also the hard ones. We should love those people who we don’t quite know how to deal with. Those who are broken and hurting. Those who get on our nerves and even those people who are cranky who we sometimes feel don’t deserve our love.

We are called to love everyone and that includes the messy people.  Loving messy people sometimes can be scary and sometimes quite hard to do.  We don’t get to pick and choose who God gives us to love.  We are just to love them as he loves us. We are all messy people at times and thankfully no matter how messy I am God still loves me.

Dear Lord thank you for the messy people you have put in my life because they show me I am messy too.

We love because he first loved us – John 4:19